Thursday, 31 May 2007

Fallin' on my head

16 or so km on the bike in the pouring rain.

Yesterday's Fuel

breakfast: 2 bacon cobs
lunch: bagel with salami
dinner: Mum's steak pie, mum's meatloaf
Vegggies? We don't need no stinkin' veggies!
booze: 4 Stellas
weight: no scales on tour

Wednesday, 30 May 2007

booze: none

30 bench presses, 30 deadlifts, 30 barbell shoulder presses, 30 pull ups, 30 leg presses, 30 barbell rows, chest stretches, roundhouse stretches.

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: bacon and mushrooms with toast
lunch: KFC Zinger Tower Burger
tea: pork chop and cauliflower
M4 Pit Stop: Hoi sin duck wrap, grapes and melon
night cap: Mum's steak pie
booze: none
weight: no scales on tour

Tuesday, 29 May 2007

Signed Worried of Skewen

There is a growing concern amongst those who care about me that if I drink at the same breakneck pace that I have done in the recent past I will shortly and surely be dead !

I cannot decide if that is a sobering thought or one which makes me think that I need a drink !

Temperate week ahead, that could in itself cause some troubled waters.

On an exercise front my exertions of the weekend were limited to labour in the Garden. The decking frame should be completed later tonight and it is plain sailing from there !!!!

courteous and receptive to courtesy

“Life is not so short but that there is always time for courtesy”

breakfast: bacon sarnie courtesy of A Welsh Born Icon

lunch hour: core stability courtesy of Gordon

teatime: mutton and vegetable curry, ox-tail, potato salad, rice 'n peas, and coleslaw followed by rum cake courtesy of Garfield. Free glass of pinot grigio courtesy of Gianni.

dinner: 2 hours Muay Thai courtesy of Kru Johnny

night cap: 3 Stellas courtesy of Venus

weight: 13 st 2 courtesy of Salter scales

Monday, 28 May 2007

Different Class

Body Combat class in Virgin Active, then 300m swim 10:33.62.

Calzone and salad
Booze: 5 or 6 Stellas and half a red wine
weight: 13 st 2

Sunday, 27 May 2007

Australia 29-23 Wales

They've got TVs built into the exercise machines in Virgin, so I watched the rugby there yesterday.
First half: 30 mins run at 10km/hr
Half time: stretching
Second half: 12.75 Km hills level 10 on the bike.

Completely drained mentally, physically and emotionally as a try with the last move of the match from replacement Stephen Hoiles denied Wales a first win over the Wallabies in Australia since 1969.

Yesterday's Fuel:
breakfast: steak and bubble 'n squeak
snack: mint chocolate chip ice cream
dinner: corned beef hash
booze: 5 Stellas, half red wine
weight: 13 st 4

Saturday, 26 May 2007

Pizza the Action

30 bench presses, 30 deadlifts, 30 barbell shoulder presses, 30 pull ups, 30 leg presses, 30 barbell rows, 30 incline sit ups, chest stretches.
breakfast: sardines on taost
lunch: Pizza Hut all you can eat buffet
dinner: cereal bar and bananas
booze: 4 Stellas, red wine
weight: 13 st 0

Friday, 25 May 2007


I must be in one as, yet again I have failed to do any meaningful training.
This apathy must be turned to ardour if I am going to complete the August rematch !
"Your fans out there deserve a rematch!
It ain't gonna be no rematch!"


Swam 500m while Ben had his lesson yesterday. My new Timex Ironman watch told me that I did the first 300 in 10 mins 45 seconds. My initial target is to get that down to under ten minutes.
Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: sausage sarnie
snacks: bananas
dinner: XL Burger King Whopper and fries
booze: 4 Stellas
weight: 13 st 3

Thursday, 24 May 2007

Plumbing the depths

As if I was having a nudge in the ribs to turn up the pace Rocky Balboa has just been released on DVD. It must be a sign, there can be no other plausible explanation ! Can there ?

Straight from work to the training centre of excellence to get on with a virtual Tri then to the centre of drinking excellence for a genuine, real, good old fashioned knees up ! Knee raising is, of course, a very useful aerobic exercise, particularly for the Triathlete !

Walk Alone

3km treadmill 10.3 km/hr.
20 mins exercise bike hills level 10

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: egg mayonnaise and sausage sandwich with tomato and red pepper relish
dinner: nachos, chilli, guacamole, sour cream and jalapenos
booze: how ever much lager one drinks between the end of work and the end of the European Cup Final
booze fuelled snack: sausage and jaffa cakes
weight: 13 st 1

Wednesday, 23 May 2007

A little fishing accident on R&R, sir.

Events threw me a day off training yesterday. I was just setting off on the bike when I got a call asking me to pick up the new ninja bomber from school, as he was feeling off-colour.

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: spinach and potato tortilla with hot sauce
dinner: sausages and chips
booze: 4 Stellas, Red wine
weight: 13 st 0

Tuesday, 22 May 2007

It's a wrap

Two hours Muay Thai class last night. Have now invested in my own wraps. Succeeded in aggravating my ankle and elbow again.

Yesteday's Fuel
breakfast: bubble 'n squeak with a fried egg
lunch: tuna and sweetcorn baguette
snack: banana
booze: 3 Stellas
weight: 13 st 3

Fork 'n Spadework

Back in the Spartan Garden last night. Almost there on the digging front, plants transplanted, lights shifted. Time to start on the concreting and the building of a decking base.
I am missing out on gym-time because of the excesses of the weekend and the outdoor life but I have avowed to make a glorious return tomorrow morning !
Today I will be at St. James Church then The Welcome then The Barn. The gym would be a welcome substitute in the circumstances.
Arrangements are formulating for a scout around the Afan Argoed Triathlon Trail. That should spur my return to training !

Monday, 21 May 2007

Same Again

3km at 10.2 km/h on the treadmill
15km hills level 10 on the exercise bike
300m swim

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: marmalade on toast
dinner: chicken, cauliflower and tomato curry with rice
booze: 2 kronenbourg, 2 Fosters, 2 Stellas, red wine
weight: 13 st 2

The Worst Possible Preparation.

Thursday - Pub.
Friday - Pub / Hotel / Pub.
Saturday - Pub / House Party.
Sunday - Pub ( for a carvery ) / Home for a rest / Pub for more poison.

With August just around the corner and certain others already bossing the Virtu-tri and honing for speed and stamina I think it is time for a radical rethink of regime !
I will not be going out until Tuesday this week !!!

Sunday, 20 May 2007

Virt Y'All

3km at 10.1 kn/h on the treadmill
15km hills level 10 on the exercise bike
300m swim

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: mushroom and spinach scrambled egg on toast
dinner: chip shop chicken curry and chips
booze: 1 Fosters, 5 Stellas
weight: 13 st 3

Saturday, 19 May 2007

Wrist Action

Did an hour with Gordon yesterday on core strength and flexibility. He also explained how I had hurt my elbow with imperfect deadlift technique. It seems that when I retract my scapula I should rotate my shoulders and elbows towards my body and my wrists outward.

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: egg mayonnaise and sausage sandwich with tomato and red pepper relish
dinner: chicken, cauliflower and tomato curry with rice
booze: 6 Stellas
beer fuelled snack: chocolate digestives and a pear
weight: 13 stone 5

Friday, 18 May 2007

Programme 4

Check it out ! The Title is a link.
We have just enough time to grow our hair, grab a bottle o' Jack, restring the BC Rich, kick the Missus out and ROCK !
Perhaps I should get out a bit more ? But not on a Saturday for the next few months !

Sign of the times

I only managed 400m in the pool yesterday as Ben bailed out of his swimming lesson five or six minutes before the end complaining that he was cold. I really want to start timing my swims, but I find looking at the poolside clock through my goggles tricky and confusing. I wonder if there is a cheap waterproof wearable stop watch I can get.

Speaking of times, I got my result from the Childline Challenge yesterday: 1 hour 25 minutes and 5 seconds. A bit lame but I record it here for beating next year.

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: sausage sandwich
dinner: XL BK Whopper and fries
booze: 4 Stellas
weight: 13 st 4

Thursday, 17 May 2007

Flagitious times of late !

My modus for recent Thursday evenings has been an continuing experimentation with excess and tolerance.
With this Blog nagging at me I have decided that I will have to get a trip to the gym out of the way before continuing with any such exploits tonight.
I am far from saying that I will not conduct a few tests, it is just that I will earn the privilege with exercise rather than continuing to draw from my already overdrawn fatigue account.

Current Level of Alcohol Consumption. V's. My Constitution.
Discuss :

"He's all wrong for us, baby. I saw you beat that man like I never saw no man get beat before, and the man kept coming after you. Now we don't need no man like that in our lives"

Skillz 'n Pillz

I had to take the car to the garage yesterday, so I packed the bike, cycled back to the office, cycled at lunchtime, then cycled back to the garage later in the afternoon. I need to do more cycling on a real rather than exercise bike. My chain came off yesterday for example and I managed to rethread it without stopping or tangling it by careful pedalling. I wish I could have done that in Swansea. Better cycling skills will help in my next outing.

Still taking the odd nurofen for its anti-imflammatory properties. Common adverse effects include priapism according to Wikipedia, but I can't report feeling any perkier than usual.

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: mushroom and spinach omelette on wholemeal toast.
dinner: Special Bavarian Beerhouse "Wurstplatte" - Sausage Platter
booze: 2 Kronenbourgs, 2 Stellas, 2 steins of Hacker Pschorr
weight: 13 st 4

Wednesday, 16 May 2007


Yesterday's lunchtime
SMR and 12km hills level 10 on the recumbent bike. I guess I'm stuck on the bike and in the pool until my elbow and ankle heal up.

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: sausages, mushrooms and toast.
dinner: Pizza Hut, HUt, HUT!
beer fueled later night snack: roast chicken leg and a pear.
booze: 7 Stellas
weight: 13 st 4

There's one thing I want you to do for me.

What's that?

Last night I chased chickens and started the process of learning to complete a Triathlon using a conventional rather than a Southpaw stance.
I suspected the lack of gym work and the lack of Balboa viewing would have destroyed all my previous training gains. I am happy to report that a little garden digging and a certain amount of Leonidas have done their job in restricting the otherwise inevitable plunge into decrepitude and enfeeblement.

3km treadmill - crawling pace and no incline.
10Km bike - on Cardio mode maintaining heart rate at 147 in honour of the fact that I would rather have been playing snooker !
15minutes - X-Trainer level 8.
100m Swim - crawl but that describes both stroke and pace.
This was followed by my specialist event in which my 'It's a knock out' joker was played - steam room and Jacuzzi.
In order to reward my body for its exertions I treated it to several Stella's and a cheeky Hamlet moment.

Tuesday, 15 May 2007

Back on Track - Back on Attack.

I have fallen fallow. I hope that this period of rest will have rejuvenated my sinews ready to get back to some semblance of fitness; Though I more than doubt it.
I have done sod all since the Tri itself and I had a fortnight on the pop before that. Since then I have been in a constant Bow and Stella Haze.

This must come to an end - I will revitalise a fitness campaign this very day !
Straight to the gym after work in order to assess my complete loss of any fitness, speed and stamina.
A base camp from which to climb.
The air is rarefied but as Bruce Springsteen says in a Segar style "We will overcome !"

Nurofen Nation

I went to Muay Thai last night and I'm suffering with a sore left elbow and right ankle but you should see the other guy. More seriously I had niggles in both these areas before but I seem to have aggravated them somewhat.

Note to self: Death - nature's way of telling you to slow down.

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: brown rice, spinach and ham
dinner: chicken, grapes and crisps
booze: 1 Stella, 1 glass red wine
weight 13 st 4

Monday, 14 May 2007

Rocky II

We need speed. Speed's what we need. Greasy, fast speed!

Now that I've proved I can actually get around a triathlon, it is time to address getting round it a little more crisply. As ever there is an appropriate Micky Goldmill quote - see above.

The Afan Novice traithlon consists of 15k on the bike and a 3k run.

Lunchtime as benchmarks I did 3k at 10km/h on the treadmill and 15 k at level 5 on the exercise bike in 36 mins 1 sec. (My inner thighs were really suffering at the end of the cycle because I'm not used to pedalling fast for long.)

This is what I have to build upon. A good thing about triathblog is it can remind me that I was only running at 8km/h when I started training in January.


The Springfield results are in. I came 179th out of 184 and seem to have been the single slowest swimmer. Never mind. I'm sure I will do better next time, and at least my novice credentials for the Afan Forest Park Novice Triathlon are unimpeachable.

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: marmalade on toast
snack: Cornish pastie
snack: cheese and ham sandwich
lunch: chicken and chips
dinner: cheese
booze: 3 stellas, 3 bows, red wine
weight: 13 st 7

Sunday, 13 May 2007

Side Saddle

Rode shotgun with the New Ninja Bomber as he made his way back to his Mum's by bike, then did 10k round the streets. I meant to do 15 but rain intervened.

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: bacon and spinach scrambled egg on toast
lunch: cheese and onion baguette
dinner: pasta with spinach, cheese, tomato, red pepper and plum.
booze: 5 stellas
weight: 13 st 7

Saturday, 12 May 2007


Went for a gentle jog this morning looking for a 3k route to train for Afan Argoed. Will be in the gym doing some weights 1:30 to 2:30 while the new ninja bombler is in Club V.

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: marmite on wholemeal toast
lunch: mutton curry, rice 'n peas, and 'slaw courtesy Garfield.
dinner: special fried rice of my own design followed by grapes
booze: 5 Stellas
weight: 13 st 5

Friday, 11 May 2007

None for me either

An hour "core stability" with Gordon.

Yesterday's Fuel.
breakfast: sardines on toast
lunch: tropical fruit salad
dinner: Burger King XL Whopper
booze: none
weight: 13 st 6

Clarence Garlow of Welsh

"Laissez les bons temps rouler!"

30th June.
The Blog becomes the new reality.
Be afraid, be very afraid !

Move over, move over! Let Jimmy take over.

Stella Haze was in my brain,
lately things don't seem the same,
actin' funny but I don't know why
'scuse me while I kiss the sky.

Stella Haze all around,
don't know if I'm coming up or down.
I happy or in misery?
Whatever it is, that girl put a spell on me.

Stella Haze was in my eyes,
don't know if it's day or night,
you've got me blowing, blowing my mind
is it tomorrow or just the end of

My head Hurts !


I was challenged by the DuBois family last night. I consumed freely and very well. Under the Napoleonic code I think Jo must have a share in my blunt force trauma headache today !
"Did you ever hear of the Napoleonic code, Stella?... Now just let me enlighten you on a point or two... Now we got here in the state of Louisiana what's known as the Napoleonic code. You see, now according to that, what belongs to the wife belongs to the husband also, and vice versa... It looks to me like you've been swindled baby.And when you get swindled under Napoleonic code, I get swindled too and I don't like to get swindled."
On the plus side, The Sushi I just had for breakfast was paid for out of my winnings at turning cards ! Every cloud and all that !

Thursday, 10 May 2007

Has the Spadework paid off ?

After days of digging foundations and turning the back garden into a lunar landscape that would convince Buzz Aldrin that he was reliving the dream, I had a day off !
Rather than shovelling with all the grace of a rhinoceros giving birth I went to the pool and swam with equal elegance.
Still, a change is as good as a rest. Better still if you can have a steam and a jacuzzi afterwards !

Yesterdays booze intake :
Nil by mouth !
That, dear reader, is a glitch I have every intention of rectifying this very day !

Steve, if you are a dear reader what would you say to assisting me in this quest for the grail ? Not particularly a Holy Chalace, just a receptacle for the intoxicating liquor ?

Hope Floats

Today I will mostly be swimming while the new ninja bomber has his lesson.

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: bacon sarnie
dinner: numberless courses at Hunan in Pimlico
booze: 4 Stellas, industrial quantities of white wine
weight: 13 st 5

Wednesday, 9 May 2007

Back on the treadmill

SMR then 6km on the running machine.

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: hot sauce scrambled egg and bacon in a wholemeal pitta.
snack: 1.5 fishfingers
dinner: keema broccoli apricots and noodles
booze: 4 Stellas
weight: 13 st 6

Tuesday, 8 May 2007

John, this is the new challenge

Comparing the Afan Forest Park Off Road Triathlon 11th August 2007 (600m swim, 20k MTB, 6k Run) and the Afan Forest Park Novice Triathlon 11th August 2007 (300m swim, 15k Mountain Bike, 3k run), the bike sections break down like this:

Off Road Triathlon: 20k bike down the valley to Afan Argoed then a tough forest track section on the mountain bringing you back to Afan Argoed, return to Cymer.

Novice Triathlon: The cycle is out and back on the valley lower trail. Half of this course is tarmac with the remainder on compact hardcore. The course is slightly downhill to the turn at Pontrhydyfen, and gradually uphill on the return.

You and I mate, do not have bikes with suspensions that are up to "a tough forest track section". When I was at Afan Argoed with the two Robs they had machines that were sprung to all intents and purposes like motor bikes without engines.

Now that Dr Rob has ruled himself out, we should try the novice event. Here are the 2005 results to give us an idea of what we might be up against.

Cheers Jinxy !

Just wanted to thank you and the Tenacious D-no for helping out on Saturday !

Stretching the truth

Stretched and SMR's the stiffness out of my limbs and did a little core stability work over lunchtime.

Yesterday's Fuel
pre race breakfast: 2 weetabix and banana
post race dinner: keema broccoli and apricots with brown basmati rice
snack: 3 digestives
booze: 4 Stellas
weight: 13 st 6


Exercise campaign started back in an unusual fashion on Saturday when Steve the Bike, Dino the Trike ( a chip off the old block ) and Me the Scalectrix took shovel and fork to hand and attacked the back garden with a view to some levelling and some digging down to the house footings in order to ensure the proposed decking was at as low a level as possible.
We took into account the wise words of Andy Dufrense in the Shawshank Redemption
"... I only ask for three beers apiece for my co-workers, if that seems fair. I think a man feels more like a man when he's working out of doors in the springtime if he can have a bottle of suds. That's only my opinion. It would go down smooth, and I'm sure you'd have their gratitude."

Apart from that 3 beers apiece nonsense that is !

More of the same for me on Sunday - hard and unpleasant work which appears to show very little in the way of actual tangible results. I wish I had taken a photo of the area before the first shovel pierced the sod !

Monday, 7 May 2007

Job Done

The Springfield Triathlon has been conquered. Details may follow. I am off for a kip.

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: egg and bacon
lunch: filled bread rolls, pizza and other picnic savouries
dinner: cheese, ham and red pepper pasta, baked mushrooms and Greek salad
booze: 1 Stella
weight: 13 st 7 (on return to London)

Sunday, 6 May 2007

He rested

Today's dry run is a quiet cycle along the triathlon's running route.

Yesterday's Fuel.
breakfast: sausages and grapes
lunch: cheese and onion sandwich
dinner: duck then pork at
booze: 4 bitters with dinner followed by countless Stellas
weight: no scales on tour

Saturday, 5 May 2007


I am off to Wiltshire for a dry run (though not I imagine a dry evening) of the cycle route for Monday's Triathlon

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: merguez sausages and broccoli
dinner: shared starters then ribs, chicken fries and coleslaw at Maxwell's Covent Garden
booze: an evening's worth of Stella and a meal's worth of red wine
beer inspired late night snack: bowl of dry chocolate weetabix
weight: 13 st 6

(P.S. I tip Oscar De La Hoya to beat Floyd Mayweather Jr.)

Friday, 4 May 2007

Get off the treadmill

SMR then 6 km run on the running machine.

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: chorizo spinach scrambled eggs in a wholemeal pitta
snack: pear
dinner: BK Whopper and fries
booze: 1 Bow, 2 Stellas
weight: 13 st 7

April Fuel

Now, correct me if I am wrong but wasn't April the month Nick was going to give up booze in order to trim down and concentrate upon his training ? By God, the man was running his firat Triathlon on 22nd !

Reviewing this blog I see that temperance was indeed your watchword!!

April's Fuel !!

Fosters : 1
Guinness : 1
Stella's : 101 ( and one undisclosed amount watching the footy )
Plenty of Stella's : 3
Many Stella's : 1
Bottles of Red : 6 1/2
Plenty of Red : 1
Mojitos : Many

The local hostelries must weep at your new moderate self - still, nice to see you are doing what you can to soften the blow for them !

Thursday, 3 May 2007

Ben Dover

Whereas I have a blunt force trauma hangover, I will be training by swimming 500m while Ben has his lesson but that is several hours away.

Yesterday's Fuel.
breakfast: chorizo and coleslaw in pitta
dinner: Escalope Milano with spaghetti
booze: white wine with dinner then Milan v Man U worth of Stella
weight: 13 st 5

Wednesday, 2 May 2007


Delayed Onset Muscle Soreness (DOMS) is the pain or discomfort often felt 24 to 72 hours after exercising and subsides generally within 2 to 3 days.
I've never had it before, but I've got it this afternoon in the top of my back and the rear of my neck. I wonder if it is from Thai boxing or from training with Gordon? The latter I expect as he had me doing quite a lot of overhead throws with a medicine ball.

What an inopportune time to receive John's request for a new challenge!

I propose the Afan Forest Park Off Road Triathlon 11th August 2007 (600m swim, 20k MTB, 6k Run) or perhaps the more modest Afan Forest Park Novice Triathlon 11th August 2007 (300m swim, 15k Mountain Bike, 3k run).

Any takers?

(I'm up for the Swansea Bay 10K Race on 23 September as he proposes as well.)

Hold the press

lunch: 30 bench presses, 30 deadlifts, 30 barbell shoulder presses, 30 pull ups, 30 squats, and 30 barbell rows. Yum

breakfast: bacon and coleslaw roll
dinner: burger and chips
snack: peas pulao rice
weight: 13 st 6
booze: white wine, 5 Stellas

Nick, what is the New Challenge ?

September should give us more than enough time to train ?
Will be able to fit another event or two in between ?

Finger Puppets ahoy !

Time to get back down to it - well tomorrow is time enough !
The 10th January seems such a long time ago - yet I recall it as though it were yesterday ?

Tuesday, 1 May 2007

Pura Vida

"Pure Life"
"This is living!"
"distilled life!" ( suggesting "I am experiencing the best in life");
"free spirit"
"love for life"
"El es pura vida" (He is pure life).

Old Skool

Went to Muay Thai last including - and I quote - "Old School Muay Boran", and I'm off for an hour fine tuning with Gordon lunch time.

Yesterday's Fuel
breakfast: chorizo scrambled eggs
lunch: chicken and peas pilao brown rice
tea: banana, pear, yogurt
booze: 3 Stellas
weight: 13 st 7